Tuesday, April 12, 2011

You would think I would be immune by now...UPDATE..UPDATE..FILM AT 11:00


Today she was eating crow....much more subdued and reasonable...sorta acted human....I was amazed.......

Guess she took my advise and checked with other florist and found out the same thing I was telling her all along.....

It's great to know that the old TAB still has the force on his side.......I mean really how can you just not love a great looking, funny, intelligent, unassuming, friendly guy like me......and the beat goes on.......

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When you deal with the public at large as I do in retail you see all types, all personalities and a wide range of mental awareness ranging from acutely intellectual to criminally insane on a weekly basis..So one would think that one would become accustomed to dealing with these personas with some degree of patience and understanding.


DateLine:  Kernersville, NC. April 12, 2011,,,Local business owner ties rope around customers leg and attaches the other end to the rear bumper of delivery van and drives through the city at 75 mph.

Not really....just wishful thinking....but the thought did cross my mind today.....

A short story about 

The wedding planner from hell !!!!!

Scenario:   Customer comes in..states she is the wedding coordinator for a bride being married in October and wishes to know the price ranges for bridal bouquets and bridesmaids bouquets....So far all is well......

When asked what type of flowers, how many, and what style of bouquets the bride was considering the
replay was ..."She really has no idea that's my job to decide what would be best for her".....

  WELL EXCUSE ME !!!!    

the red flags are now starting to wave over the home of the brave......

So after about 30 minutes of showing different bouquet design's with various flowers I inquired....
"What would you like to recommend to the bride"?  .....a somewhat logical question I assumed..........

"I don't know at this point, I just want prices so the bride can manage her wedding budget". was the reply.

Again I repeated...."Which design, which flowers, and which size bouquets for the bridal party".

"I don't know for sure...just tell me the different prices or at least give me a price range". ..was her rebuttal.

Now I explain that without specific flower choices, design specifications, and size it is impossible to give
any accurate price quotes. I go on to explain that a small stem wrapped bouquet could start at 25.00 and
a large cascade design depending on choice of flowers could run as high as 350.00 as we have done both
ends of the spectrum in 35 years of doing weddings....

At this point the "wedding coordinator" became highly agitated at me and informed me that she would just
contact a different florist to get the information she required since I was unwilling to help her.

Oh I need a cape and a sword...and a clown would be welcome also.

Mr. car much does a car cost.
Mr. much does a steak cost.
Mr. much does a suit cost.
Mr. much does a house cost.

At this point, I told said "wedding coordinator" to bring in the bride, and we would make the decisions about all the necessary items affecting price that she had no idea of and I would be glad to price the exact bouquets desired once all the information was at hand...

I was informed that if we were the last florist on the east coast, the bride would be married with wildflowers
picked from the woods, at which point I informed Miss Coordinator that we have also done that and the price is most reasonable..


what I really wanted to says was...............


  1. TAB:

    Remember that the customer is always right - even when she is wrong. :)

  2. Whit...yes of course you are correct...but the problem now is that I am becoming more and more like Lewis Black in my tolerance of utter stupidity. :)

  3. TAB,

    You need to prepare a list of prices that cover every type of bouquet including every style of flower. Then, when you have such a thing, you tell these wedding planners from hell that it'll cost her $25 for the list as it's lengthy, and you don't advertise free estimates on more than one style of bouquet with 2 or 3 different flower choices. While you are prepared to be accomodating when there is a general idea of what they want, the immensity of the list of prices was time consuming and costly to prepare. LOL

  4. Sherry...I'm almost sure this "planner" was trying to see where she could cut corners..during the 30 minutes or so of showing her different designs and flowers we discussed those prices for those particular boquet's. This girl was something else..Hey 25.00 to 350.00 is a range is it not? low end, high end or anywhere in the middle...but damn give me SOMETHING, ANYTHING to work with. Or give me your budget for flowers and let me show you what we can do....But I did offer her the telephone numbers of 4 other florist........

  5. Tab, whenever I try to email you I get this...

    Technical details of permanent failure:
    Google tried to deliver your message, but it was rejected by the recipient domain. We recommend contacting the other email provider for further information about the cause of this error. The error that the other server returned was: 550 550 5.1.1 - Invalid mailbox: (state 14).

  6. Bella it has been fixed for a long time now...that email is

  7. Sometimes the best sale you make is when you steer a customer to one of your competitors. If this coordinator was so clueless about flowers, I kinda think she's not too bright and not too experienced.

  8. Tab:

    Geez... what a bitch.. who knew that wedding coordinators could be so freaking unreasonable? The phrase Bitch slap seems like it would suit her.

  9. Scratch....old me when I tell you the thought crossed my mine more than once.

  10. okay Tabiliscious...

    Surely you got this comment email? Yes, No? Maybe?

  11. and tell that damned wedding planner, she ain't much of a planner...that biotch!

  12. I got your email fine, but neither your comment to me, or mine back to you email appears on the blog sites in the comment section. This is frustrating.